No! Please! I’ll tell you whatever you want to know!” the man yelled.
“Really?” said Vimes. “What’s the orbital velocity of the moon?”
“Oh, you’d like something simpler?
Do you ever want to talk to someone but
1) You feel like you’re bothering them or coming off clingy
2) You don’t have anything to say, you just want to talk to them
3) You don’t know how to hold a conversation to save your life
omfg I was walking home from the bus stop and I saw this elderly couple where this woman was pushing her husband in a wheelchair and I was like “aw that’s cute” but as I got closer to them I heard them talking and she was like “you’re a huge asshole, tom” and he was like “JUST PUSH ME INTO A DITCH”
ur not allowed to be busy youre my only friend
*awkwardly left alone with a baby* soooo….. do you… watch game of thrones?
hearin a really shitty pun
makin a really shitty pun
them: oh are u excited for that new marvel movie?
*gets stuck on a mission in a game* *doesn’t play for another 4234 years*
leaving your room when people are over